Goodbye, Anakin

I am sitting here, watching my boys interact with their doggy in our living room for the last time.  This picture is from their last walk together:

If you are wondering his beautiful Carin coat is so short, it is because he was attacked by fire ants this past week and I had to cut hundreds of them our of his fur, poor guy. 

I am so sad to have to write this!  There are events in life that invite me to trust in the writing of the Divine Storyteller.  This is one of those things.

We are giving Anakin to another home.  He is such a smart dog and is very obedient to me.  However, after obedience classes, reading, establishing myself as the pack leader, working with him, and getting advice for over a year, we have come to the sad conclusion that he will be a happier dog in another home... probably one without children. 

He has always been a feisty dog and we have loved that about him.  We love that he is so smart.  He is very protective which is a good thing.  It can also be a bad thing.  He has tried to bite several guests inside and outside our home and has even gone back to growling at Elijah.  With three babies starting to move around in the house, this is troubling.  It is beyond my limitations to continue to work with him at this time given our family's circumstances. 

Honestly, I feel like a failure.  I feel like I have let Elijah and Andrew down.  I feel like I have let Anakin down.  I don't like it when I can't figure something out.  I didn't want things to turn out this way.  I pray that the damage done to two little boys having their pet taken away is small in the long run. 

All that said, this is just another reminder that I am not God.  It is best for me that I do fail or that things don't go my way.  It is good for me ~and my boys~ to experience hard things.  It is soul shaping to go through times where it is obvious that we are a part of a holy drama and that the Director is always loving, always patient, always carrying us through this troubled life.  It is also good for me to rest in the fact that God loves my children more than I do.  I was talking with a good friend recently who reminded me that there are events, good and bad, that will be part of the story God is writing in their lives.  Then, I think back on my part of God's story.  He has never left me alone in pain or wasted a hurt.  God can be trusted with using well all our experiences. 

So to ease the sting of losing a pet, we gave Elijah another animal to love on; a guinea pig now named Leia (as in Princess Leia, of course)... unless Elijah calls her Stella... which he sometimes does for fun.  Both he and Andrew still miss Anakin, but are glad to have another Star Wars' character-inspired pet.  I wonder if she knows how to use a blaster...