I have to start by putting in one more plug for our adoption fund raiser through Shirts of Hope. We have had several friends buy a shirt and in turn support our adoption as well as other adoptions through Show Hope. We are truly humbled by the gifts. The deadline is March 31 for anyone else who may be interested. Click here for the link to the info page.
This past week has been really busy in the Childs house. First of all, our "house" changed. Having been in corporate housing for the past year and a half, it was time to again find a place of our own. It was especially fun to see our PODS container and unload all our stuff that has been stored away. The boys thought it was like Christmastime as they pulled out toys from boxes and bins. They were especially glad to see their train table... AND all the toys that make noise:) I had conveniently stored most of the "fun" ones. I think Elijah has pushed every button on every battery requiring toy at least 100 times in the last three days! Having not needed much of the things I had stored, it has been great inspiration to clean out as I unpacked.
Emotionally, it has been good to have a distraction as the day approaches when we learn the state of our little ones. I wish I could report that I have been cool as a cucumber waiting on the news, but honestly, I have been a mess. I want to be vulnerable here... It is such a struggle to rest and not be anxious. Couple that with loads of hormones and... well, you can venture a guess at the results:) I was having a difficult day last week; just thinking about how much we want the best for these babies but at the same time, praying they would live and come to be with our family. I have often wondered what it would be like to give birth to our twins, one Hispanic baby and one Indian/Pacific Islander baby, and witness the delivery room staff's reactions:) I have so desired to see those little faces- faces that do not resemble anyone in our family. My thoughts always drift back to the fact that God loves them and they are safe in His hands. Our responsibility is to be obedient in showing them His love. And I would do anything to show them His love, including learn to give myself the "big shots" on both sides- which I somehow managed to accomplish this week. What I don't take in consideration always is that God loves us too~ He loves me too. Trusting Him with my heart seems next to impossible sometimes. I know how this can go and how it can feel. It makes me so grateful for Jesus who has indeed captured my heart, carries me in His arms, and grants me portions of grace each day. In fact, in Him on the battlefield in my mind, I am more than a conqueror. In terms of my acceptance before Him as a daughter, my adoption is complete. I have been given perfect, sustaining love and peace. Feeling that always is so difficult in this situation. Feeling it or not, by this time tomorrow, I will know where our little ones are, God will still be good, and His grace will continue to be sufficient for me- and for all of us.
So please pray. We have been so fortunate to have had so many others around us walking beside. The nearness of God is our good, friends. And the nearness of each other is a gift. We will relay the news as soon as we are able~