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We are a family of fifteen: eight already with Jesus and seven in desperate need of Him. This is the story God is writing in our lives. Proverbs 16:9

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

Rejoicing in Tomorrow

I am many days calmed by those encouragements in the Bible that look beyond this time and space to the future. There are a few that come to mind, but this chapter in the bible, particularly this verse, have been on my mind today:

But according to His promise we are waiting for new heavens and a
new earth in which righteousness dwells.
~2 Peter 3:13~
Sometimes there is nothing more to say when addressing the brokenness of our humanity than to say, "This is how it is now but there is an eternal hope".  I think (or would hope) most of the country felt a temporal verses eternal tension in some way last night irregardless of the victory or defeat of his chosen candidate. And the more I live this life, the more those times eagerly present themselves. Everything falls into the needing redemption category. Even joy only causes longing for more joy. Pain is a sure signpost. When I cause someone else to suffer, the need is undeniable. Nothing here is perfect. Nothing is complete.

Next week, I will confront just one of those broken situations. Since age 19, I have had four surgeries to treat endometriosis. It has wreaked havoc on my body. I prayed that after the babies were born, my symptoms would be better, however they have presented much worse. I have exhausted all options for treatments and after the last visit to my doctor, I was on a "call when you are ready to schedule surgery" basis. On November 13, I will have a subtotal hysterectomy. There are still unknowns post-surgery. I would ask you to pray and consider each of these things.

As I balance the sufferings, I also am perceptibly aware of the way God has allowed my broken body to carry our children. Despite the endo, this womb has been used to full capacity ~ in ways that are humbling and astounding. The finality of this procedure does make a gal sentimental, thankful, and sad as I remember years of pain and the contrasting moments of joy. As many hyster-sisters before me, I will grieve the loss of part of me that God built so I would experience the wonder and beauty (and cursedness) of womanhood.

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away,
our inner self is being renewed day by day.
~2 Corinthians 4:16~
One day, I am going to breathe deeply in a body that is no longer dying, hurting, or wearing out. And on that day, I will know redemption. There is a lovely song by a group called Gungor that rejoices in this and you can hear it here.

Until then, life here is what it is... Yet it is not all. Tolkien says it well through Sam who asks, "Is everything sad going to come untrue?" In this nonfictional land and for those who are found in Christ, praise God, one day it will!


Ashley said...

Having endo as well I'm sorry you've been suffering. Praying your surgery goes well and recovery is quick and complete.

Anonymous said...

Oh Tiffany! You said it so well. Your post reminds me of 2 Cor 4:7-10 "But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies." I too have endometriosis and have had surgery to "fix it" and the doctors say one day soon i will have to have a hysterectomy. But right now after 6 years of walking the infertility road I am one day pregnant with our first child, a snowflake baby. We are awaiting the pregnancy test next week to see if the embryo implanted. Much joy yet
fighting fears that this baby maybe taken home to
heaven. I gain much encouragement from you blog and have for two years now. Thank you for sharing. I will keep you in my prayers.
Dannette Dicharry (Amber and Chance Nichols friend)